Paige DeSorbo’s $50 Butter Yellow Wedding Pick Is the Only Dress You’ll Need This Summer
Sage Matthews here, and if you’re reading this at 2:47 a.m. with your third cold coffee in hand and a sinking feeling that the world is irredeemably broken, then welcome to the club. Because of course Paige DeSorbo — yes, the same woman who once made a reality TV season feel like a psychological thriller — has now turned her attention to Amazon wedding dresses under $70. And somehow, I’m not surprised. Not even slightly.
Let’s be real: summer weddings are still happening, which means people are still being forced into social obligations they didn’t sign up for, all while wearing outfits that cost more than a month’s rent. But Paige, ever the “I’ve got this” queen of chaotic energy, has stepped in with a live Amazon shopping stream where she’s endorsing butter yellow dresses for less than fifty bucks. That’s right — a dress so cheerful it might just trigger a mild existential crisis in anyone who hasn’t smiled since 2019.
She’s not just throwing random links at the screen, either. She’s actually explaining why each dress works — or doesn’t — for different types of weddings. “This is kind of How to Lose a Guy in 10 Days vibes,” she says about one flouncy, ruffled number with an adjustable strap and a keyhole back. Oh, how we’ve come full circle: from romantic comedies to reality stars selling us hope through polyester. And yet… I can’t look away.
There’s a pale yellow one she’s obsessed with — “everyone’s really into pale yellow right now,” she notes, as if we’re all part of some secret cult of pastel obsession. Then there’s the light blue strapless, the brown cowl-neck (which she insists should be worn to black-tie events because “brown should be more and more for black tie”), and even a sequined emerald green stunner that’s “for a less formal garden wedding.” Let me get this straight: we’re now assigning emotional weight to fabric choices based on whether the event is “garden” or “black tie”? The hierarchy of human suffering has officially been codified in fashion.
And don’t get me started on the “simple black” option. “If you don’t go to a lot of weddings,” she says, “just go with a simple silhouette.” So basically, wear something you can repurpose for a funeral, a job interview, or a low-key night out with your dog. Genius. Truly, the only thing more predictable than her advice is the fact that I’m still watching this stream instead of going to bed.
She even suggests wearing dresses backward — “making it look different” — as if transforming a $50 garment into two looks is the ultimate act of rebellion against consumerism. Meanwhile, the planet burns, inflation spikes, and we’re all just trying to survive another weekend of mandatory joy. But hey, at least we have options. Or at least the illusion of them.
So yes, Paige DeSorbo has found a way to turn wedding stress into a viral shopping spree. It’s not revolutionary. It’s not meaningful. But in a world where everything feels like it’s collapsing under its own absurdity, sometimes the most radical act is simply showing up in a butter yellow dress and pretending it’s enough.
Anyway, can’t wait to see how this gets worse.
Sources: Celebrity Storm and E! Online
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