Orlando Bloom Claps at Merkel Date Joke as Perry-Trudeau Rumors Swirl
I’m Sage Matthews, bleary eyed and doomscrolling again, muttering “Of course this happened” as I scroll past another celebrity sideshow that confirms humanity is slowly unraveling. Just when you think we might slow down on the absurd, Orlando Bloom gets dragged into a satirical circus poking fun at his recent split while his ex’s dating life becomes tabloid fuel.
On August 1, the satirical outlet The Onion posted a fake story claiming “Just weeks after announcing his split with fiancée Katy Perry, English actor Orlando Bloom was photographed Friday dining with former German Chancellor Angela Merkel.” The caption detailed the “insider source” who allegedly spotted Bloom and Merkel sipping wine, slurping oysters, and splitting a decadent chocolate layer cake at a Michelin-starred restaurant. In response to the AI-generated image and cheeky commentary, Bloom dropped a series of clapping emojis in the comments, giving the prank a round of applause.
The jab at Bloom is a sly nod to the swirling rumors linking his ex, Katy Perry, to former Canadian prime minister Justin Trudeau. That romance chatter took off just over a month after Perry and Bloom confirmed their engagement was off. On July 3, both their teams told E! News, “Due to the abundance of recent interest and conversation surrounding Orlando Bloom and Katy Perry’s relationship, representatives have confirmed that Orlando and Katy have been shifting their relationship over the past many months to focus on coparenting.” They added that each appearance together would center on co-parenting their 4-year-old daughter, Daisy Dove.
Meanwhile, Perry and Trudeau stepped out for a low-key dinner at Le Violon restaurant in Montreal, followed by Trudeau showing up at Perry’s July 20 Lifetime tour stop. Social media photos captured the politician smiling and leaning against a railing in a special viewing area as Perry performed.
Back in June, Bloom seemed intent on rebooting his own life philosophy, sharing Instagram Stories quoting Buddha: “Each day is a new beginning. What we do today is what matters most.” A follow-up post borrowed words from Buddhist leader Daisaku Ikeda: “The important thing is to take that first step. Bravely overcoming one small fear gives you the courage to take on the next day.”
For those nostalgic for the Bloom-Perry saga, their decade-long on-off romance burned bright at a 2016 Golden Globes after-party. They reunited days later at a Stella McCartney show, bonded backstage at a Los Angeles play, and eventually became Instagram official by spring. Perry even squashed cheating whispers when photos of Bloom and Selena Gomez in Las Vegas surfaced, tweeting that people should “check out how cool this is” instead of fueling “dumb conspiracies.”
Another day, another celebrity detour into the absurd. In the grand tradition of misfired AI and tabloid fever dreams, Orlando Bloom’s applause emoji response may be the only sane reaction left. At this point, should we even pretend to be surprised?
Sources: Celebrity Storm and E! News, The Onion
Attribution: Creative Commons Licensed
