Inside the Shocking Charges Against New Pornographers Drummer
Another entry for the human highlight reel: Joseph Seiders, the 44-year-old percussionist backing Canadian indie outfit The New Pornographers, was cuffed in Palm Desert after allegedly turning a Chick-fil-A bathroom into his own secret recording studio. According to the Riverside County Sheriff’s Department press release (April 7), an 11-year-old boy reported a man filming him with a phone while he was using the restroom—proof that some folks really need a new hobby. Deputies say two days later a second incident at the same fast-food chain led to Seiders’ arrest on suspicion of possessing child sexual abuse materials, molesting a child and invasion of privacy (Calif. Penal Code §311.11 et seq.). That’s right: bathroom acoustics wasn’t the only thing he was capturing.
Investigators executed a search warrant at Seiders’ Palm Desert home and allegedly unearthed further evidence linking him to both episodes. The Riverside County Public Defender’s Office declined to comment, per court records, which might suggest they’re busy updating their own “How to Defend Yourself in 10 Easy Steps” pamphlet. Meanwhile, The New Pornographers—who enlisted Seiders in 2014—announced on Instagram, “Everyone in the band is absolutely shocked, horrified and devastated by the news of the charges against Joe Seiders.” You know it’s bad when your band’s group chat turns into a support group for emotional whiplash.
Seiders’ arrest has ignited a frenzy of speculation about potential additional victims, with law enforcement warning that the investigation remains ongoing. Social media reactions ranged from macabre fascination (“What track was playing during the filming?”) to righteous anger, turning indie rock Discord servers into battlegrounds of moral outrage and sporadic memes. As if fans needed another reason to pause before streaming their favorite tracks.
Punctuating the absurdity of the saga, Chick-fil-A’s PR line apparently hasn’t been this busy since the great waffle fry debate of 2018. The restaurant chain issued a brief statement thanking deputies “for their swift action” and urging customers to remain safe—because nothing says family-friendly like bathroom surveillance allegations. Sources confirm there have been no other incidents reported at Palm Desert locations, though skeptics wonder if they’ve simply upgraded to more discreet hidden cameras.
Well, there you have it: an indie drummer turned alleged criminal mastermind, bathroom violations worthy of a crime procedural, and a band scrambling to hit “Unfriend.” Tune in next time for more questionable life choices and the inevitable tweets that follow.
Sources: Celebrity Storm and AP News, Riverside County Sheriff’s Department, The New Pornographers Instagram, HuffPost
Attribution: Miikka Skaffari (Creative Commons)
